FZR
R1
07 APR 07
The
first bike I got was this Yamaha FZR. It was my Dad’s and
he passed it to me. Although I like bikes, the look, the shiny metal
parts and the faring and all, I am not really what you call a bike
enthusiast. I don’t really know the mechanics so you won’t
see me modifying or dismantling anything under void decks. I didn’t
even know that I gotta change the engine oil and you gotta add 2T
and all that maintenance stuff. My conversation are not peppered
with phrases like “spark plugs”, “sprocket nuts”
and other bike lingo. I’m the hey-that-bike-look-sweet-I wanna-take-it
for-a-spin-and-after-that park-it kinda guy. |
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I don't
understand a word he is saying. |
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| Okay
so where was I, yeah, my first bike was a Yamaha FZR. I was happy
to have this mode of transportation. However, it was filthy, old
and leaking engine oil like a grandpa with no bladder control. But
it served it’s purpose for so many years until I decided to
get rid of it eventually. It was a second hand bike and since my
Dad passed it to me.. that means it’s already reaching 3rd
hand. One thing immediately I realized when coming to own a bike,
is that the Civil Defence thugs in my camp (when I was in National
Service) suddenly gave me this newfound respect. They
already punched the Mess Boy and a Provost.. yes, I can so feel
that my turn is gonna be up next:) Anytime now… So I was
thankful that they had a change of heart when I got my bike. Maybe
they were into bikes or maybe it was because I manage to befriend
this new ex-convict guy in camp and he was always with me at that
time. Oh well, whatever it is, they were not bugging me and I’m
glad. |
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Whether
it was the bike or the brute friend behind me..
at last, I received the respect that I deserved. |
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Another
thing I realized when I got my bike was that I started to grow
lazy. Anything beyond 3 meters was a chore and I had to jump on
my bike. If my Mum would let me ride my bike indoors, I would.
I’ll ride my bike from the kitchen to my room. I practically
treated my bike like a 300 pound bicycle. I don’t mind paying
petrol as long as I don’t have to walk far. I would whine
and grumble if my friends made me walk. It was like the motorbike
was my new set of legs or something. |
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The
thing about my bike I have to mention is that the previous owner
painted my Yamaha FZR bike with this weird color scheme. At
the tail of the bike it has this thing that said R1. I thought
nothing about it and I thought it meant like a reminder for
him like “Reverse Gear 1” or maybe R was his girlfriend’s
intial… “Randy you are No. 1” Okay Randy is
a guy’s name.. maybe he’s gay? So the previous gay
owner didn’t explain why he resprayed the FZR bike and
what the R1 stood for until one day my friend enlightened me
that R1 is a super huge much cooler bike than my lame FZR and
I had the identical color scheme to the 1998 model.
Now
that was embarrassing. Imagine getting a Ferrari logo and pasting
it on your Toyota car. And that explains all the sniggering
I got on the road every time an authentic R1 bike owner overtake
me. And no wonder the Traffic Police forgot to give me a ticket
when I beat the red light. He was laughing at my bike till he
forgot why he stop me for. And until today, my friends still
crack that old bike R1 joke.
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The original R1. Huge and sleek. |
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My
FZR that had a smiliar R1 paint job. Can you understand the embarassment
I gotta go through now? |
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How the original FZR looks like. |
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| But
for the years I rode my bike, I do have my bizarre riding tales
to share. And if you do too, why don’t you drop me an email.
Reading email from strangers never fail to crack a smile on my face!
Insects vs machine
vs man
Insects and motorbike riding goes hand in hand. There were 2 occasions
I remembered that I had a close encounter with them creepy crawlies.
I was riding along any other road until I pass through a swarm
of bees. Yes.. BEES. I got bees hanging for dear life on my t
shirt, splattered on my visor and hitching a free ride on my tank.
I guess those bees are not soldier bees but rather, second class
bapuk worker bees. They did not make an attempt to even sting
me. There was no exhibition of loyalty to the Queen bee at all.
Maybe they were confused on how they got there so they were trying
to recuperate. I just brush the dazed bees off my bike that was
all.
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| Another
insect confrontation was when something small and shadowy suddenly
got caught inside my helmet. It didn’t move but it did obstruct
my vision a little. I thought nothing of it, cause maybe it was
some dried leaf. But when I parked my bike and took off my helmet,
I realized it was a freaking fat dragonfly! Like a pansy, I threw
the helmet and it landed on the nearby carpark tree. Hey you can’t
blame me, it was huge and hideous! It’s a good thing that
it did not try to fly around in my helmet whilst I was on the road;
that would just be a traffic accident waiting to happen. But what
worried me more is how can I explain to the Traffic Police.
TP: Sir, are you riding
under the influence of alcohol?
EB: No, a dragonfly flew in my helmet. I thought it was a dry
leaf, then it started to buzz. I panic and lost control. When
I hit the van, the dragonfly flew away.
TP: Okay, you are obviously drunk. You have to come with us.
I grab a twig and manage
to flick it away. Damn insects. Stop bugging me. Haha. Get it..
“bug” me.. Nevermind.
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Point
of view of me riding on the road with a helmet on. |
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Birdies
The weirdest animal obstruction was when I was riding my bike
along PIE. Since I was on the expressway, my speed was significantly
high. Then over the distance, I notice a Myna bird flying really
low. She can fly in the clouds, glide down on trees or flirt with
other Myna boys on top of HDB flats but just for that day, she
decided to fly low in the middle of the expressway. I don’t
why, but whatever her reason, she was, at that time. I keep my
speed constant and there’s no way I’m gonna hit the
E brake and have the car behind me swerve. The Myna bird was oblivious
because she was flying in the same direction and soon the inevitable
thing happened. Still in midair, my motorbike handle hit the poor
bird. I looked back and saw the bird on the tar with its wings
flapping. She doesn’t even know what hit her. I felt bad
but what can I do? Make a U-turn in the middle of the expressway
and dodge the incoming traffic? Hmm... come to think about it,
I should have.
TP: You again! How did this mess happen?
EB: I hit a flying myna bird, then I made a u-turn to save her..
then she flew away.
TP: You must been drinking the whole night! Cuff him boys.
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The low flying bird looks a lot like Pic A.. Then again it also
have this resemblance of Pic B. It also looked just like Pic C
when it opened its beak like that... Damn it! These birds all
look the same! |
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| I
did got into an accident once. I was feeling very sleepy and I was
at some unknown part of Tampines. Tampines is a freaking labyrinth..
no, I take that back... Hougang is.. it’s like a freaking
unescapable maze! I don’t know how many times I got lost in
the middle of nowhere in Hougang. My eyes were half opened (I was
tired and sleepy) and at the same time I’m looking for directions.
Then, after I cross an intersection, CRASH!. I hit the butt of a
cab. If I am not wrong, you can’t park your vehicle immediately
after a yellow box. Fire Hydrant- 3 meters, Intersection 9 METERS!
But whatever it is, the front part of my bike was wrecked but the
butt of the cab was still spanking new. The bike can still move
but it has plastic parts dangling.
Like I said, I’m
no mechanic but I need a quick fix. So I park my bike beside the
curb and went to the Popular books store nearby to get some sticky
tape. (Trust an arts & crafts man to solve mechanical problems
using everyday stationery :P) I secured the loose parts and off
I go to the hospital? No, to Orchard Road, cause my friends was
waiting for me. After dinner and a movie, then I went to Changi
General Hospital. I was X-rayed and the doc said everything was
fine. But the hilight of the day is when he gave me a 1 day MC.
Yeah!
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Lost at Hougang yet again. |
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| Soon
my bike was giving me problems. It kept leaking oil like it’s
peeing. Uncles at repair shops kept giving me the “just scrap
this junk” look. I kept paying huge bills just to keep it
moving. It was as if it was on life support so I decided to ditch
the whole thing. Riding the MRT was a better alternative. No more
riding in the hot sun with your brain baking in a helmet. No more
caught in the rain on the expressway with drenched undies. But still,
I sometimes miss not having a motorbike.
My next bike will be a 3000cc Gorilla Firebird
Lancer XL1 2000,
Evil Bunny!
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This bike makes me drool and cry at the same time. |
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