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Jurong
East Swimming Complex Part 2 of 2
05 FEB 07
Just
when you thought the tubes are a whole lot of fun, wait till you
go to the Lazy River. Yup, you heard me right, thats what they call
it. This river is actually a longkang-like structure with strong
current going anti-clockwise. All job worries, late car payment
bills, your spouse cheating on you and your kids doing badly in
their exams will melt, once you place yourself on a float, tilt
your head back and let yourself go at the mercy of the Lazy River.
It's perfect for lazy
people (no surprise there) as the river will push your fat ass
around the complex until oblivion. Where will the river take you?
No one knows. Will you achieve nirvana? Perhaps. Is this what
heaven feels like? Maybe.
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Even
on a weekday, the river can be crowded.
How do you solve traffic problems? |
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With installing an ERP gantry, of course! Works like a charm. |
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To
increase the pleasure meter, always go to JESC on a weekday
cause you know that the crowd won’t be as bad on weekends
and the thought of working Singaporeans slogging that day while
you drift on some float without a care in the world makes the
day more special:)
As
you float around, do lie down and stare at the sky for maximum
comfort. You can also play a game of “What does that cloud
look like” with your friends. Very nice:)
The
river is best approached with a float or without. If you need
some much needed leg exercise, just try to walk against the
current. I bet you can’t last the whole round. The makers
of the lazy river understands your hectic lifestyle, so they
decided to pamper you further by having setting up water sprinklers,
jets, a car wash thingy and a dark cave tunnel to create a more
interesting, lazy ride. Power right?:)
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How
can we forget about the Wave pool. And like it's name suggest,
this pool, unlike other lame swimming complexes, has waves in
it. The wave comes in sets and when it comes, it really comes.
How do you know if a wave is starting? Simple. A huge water
jet will start gushing to the sky and you swear you thought
it was raining. You can see people scrambling from the tubes
just to catch the wave because they go in intervals of 15 mins,
if I'm not wrong.
If
you are not a good swimmer, please have a float with you cause
the tide can be rough. Honest. If you have a short stature,
and think that you are safe in the 1.6m mark, think again. When
the wave machine start churning, the wave can go as high as
around 1.8m. I’ve seen my cousin choking for air and an
Indian lady trying to catch her breath. So before somebody drown
and they ban JESC, please do everybody a favour and get a float
and don’t die.
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There
are some neat tricks to play in the pool. Assisted by the waves,
I see a lot of Mats trying to reach the edge of the pool and who
can hang the longest wins, I guess. We try a go at it and it's
fun.
Another
thing you can try is wave surfing using your float! Now this
is awesome, cannot handle, fun. Try to get on the float and
prop yourself up with your knees, (not as easy as you think),
then try to ride the wave as long as possible. You confirm wipe
out one! Haha!
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Mats hanging to dear life. |
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Step
1: Get on your float.
Step 2: Get on your knees.
Step 3: Ride the wave like a badass! |
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But
them lifeguards can be a downer at times. I think if you look
too happy and having a hell of a time, that is when they will
blow the whistle at you to stop whatever fun activity you are
engrossly doing.
The
best time to know when to leave JESC is when your fingers turn
pruny. For us, that took like 5 hours. We left the complex feeling
exhausted, sunburned and utter satisfaction only JESC can provide.
So what are you waiting for? If you have children, stop all that
tuition, piano lessons, chess practice for 1 measly day and give
the kids a break by spending an entire afternoon there. For the
rest of you guys, get together and go already.
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Everybody is prepared to scarifice
their lives to the impending Tsunami! |
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When
there's no wave, everyone goes to the tubes.
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When
the wave hits, everybody scrambles in. |
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Before
I end this. Here are some fast facts:-
1) JESC is cheep. Adults pay $1.50. Children
below 18 years old (if I’m not wrong) and Senior citizen
pays 80 cents too. We pay a total of $10 for 10 people.
2) Besides the tubes, sloth river and wave pool, the complex
also has this water playground for kids and a mushroom-like
fountain which Gigi conviently calls "The Mushroom."
3) Did I mention there's a Jacuzzi area? Just sit near one of
those powerful jets as it massages your back better than any
of those sleazy massage parlours.
I guess that's about it you guys. Hope
you guys enjoyed the JESC segment as much as I enjoyed writing
about it. Tune in next time to see life through the eyes of
the Evil Bunny.
Wonders
never cease,
Evil Bunny
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