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My
Mom
14 MAY 07
Since
Mothers Day is here, I thought I write about MY Mum. Now my Mum
is one special lady and I’m not just saying that because it’s
Mothers Day.. I say it because I’ve seen things she did and
the crap she went through and how she can still make things right
at the end. Without my Mum, I can tell you I would be a very different
person today. Before
I go on, I want to describe to you what sort of Mum I have. I
don’t have a quiet Mum.. I’ve seen some of my friends
have that sort.. or the Trophy Mum.. I seen that too and I can’t
take my eyes off those. I have what you call a “Malcolm-
in-the-middle” Mum. Have you seen that funny sitcom? My
Mum have to juggle 3 kids and chores and she’ll make sure
everything is in order before My Dad gets home. She is the sort
of Mum that would whack you good if you did wrong. And she is
also the confronting, justice-above-all type. I’ll elaborate
on that soon. |
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The "Malcolm-in-the-middle" Mum.
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Now
I know most Mums cook but NOT ALL MUMs know how to cook well.
My Mum have this uncanny gift for this cooking thing. She is like
this mutant X men and her superpower?- make Malay dishes so good
you’ll be asking for more! Honest! How good is good? Hmmm..
. How about I met a long lost friend.. never seen him for like
donkey years and the thing that is still fresh on his mind is
the time he ate “Ayam Masak Merah” (loosely translated:
Chicken Cook Red) at my place during Hari Raya. I was proud and
insulted at the same time.
I was the shoulder he would cry on when his girlfriend dumped
him, I was the one that taught him how to ride a bicycle, HECK
I was the one who saved him from drowning at the baby pool.. but
all he can remember was my Mum’s chicken dish. |
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My
Mum can also make dishes out of nothing.. Erm.. not really nothing
but when the budget goes tight.. I mean some days it goes REALLY
tight.. My Mum can still whip up a delicacy fit for any 5 star
hotel! Soy sauce, sugar and an old converse shoe? No problem,
Mum can make “Soy Sauce Ala Converse”. Salt, vinegar,
pandan leaves and a tin of insecticide? “Baygon Lemak
Curry” will be on the menu…. We never go hungry
when my Mum is around!
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More
on cooking. I always took it for granted and when I went overseas.
Since I had no Mummy, I realized how tough it was.. making fried
chicken took bloody 3 hours. I resort to fast food Kentucky instead.
And I would stock up a lot of microwavable snacks.. (Actually,
even washing dishes was a pain so I bought paper plates.. Just
wanna share with you what sort of roommate I am.. Some call me
lazy.. Others call me hassle free.) I notice my Mum never use
any tablespoons or measuring cups or any measuring apparatus..
She would scoop the salt with her surgically clean hands and would
“feel” the quantity. Expert right:D.. And I’ve
seen my Mum exchange recipes with her other Makcik friends. They
would “talk kitchen” for some minutes and exchange
data like 2 powerful servers. No need for paper and pencil people,
those things are for amatuers.. |
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When
she was a teenager, My Mum have to take care of 8 small little
kids. Niece, nephews, uncle’s brother children, kittens..
Whatever the infant, my Mum will take care of it because she was
like the family babysitter of somesort. Everybody was grown up
and was working and my Mum unfortunately gotta do the entire baby
herding. But with this experience, she is now an expert when giving
advise on health and well being of little kids. I never understood
why she would wrap infants tight with a white cloth.. The baby
would be wailing like as its suffocating by the giant popiah that
its trap in… but my Mum still does it anyway. Then when
I was much older, I saw a documentary that this practice is to
lower the risk of Sudden Death Infant Syndrome or SIDs for short.
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 I
never questioned my Mom’s wrapping popiah baby skills. |
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From
getting mucus out from a baby’s nose to watching your diet
when you are pregnant, to watching for sick symptoms, to curing
hiccups, to avoiding the post pregnancy pouch after pregnancy,
my Mum is an expert all that kind of stuff. So much so that even
my cousins, nephews and niece calls my Mom.. "Mom" when
they should be calling her by the correct term which is either
"Aunt" or "Grandma".
Another
thing I notice about my Mum is her mountain of ever-flowing
wisdom and this need for justice.. AT ALL TIME. Whenever I was
in a fix, she will help me sort it out. My Mum was with me at
crucial points in my life when I needed somebody- friends don’t
even come close. Sisters? They just bug the crap out of you
and make things worse; well, sometimes :P My Mum was there when
I had severe girl trouble, my Mum confronted other parents whose
kids bullied me, my Mum was there hammering the Captain when
I was in National Service, my Mum lash on the Doctor when he
gave me the wrong prescription.
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My Mom will take no crap from nobody.
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| Mum
doesn’t seem to care for any authoritarian figure. She even
lashed at her bosses when they make dumb decisions. I think that’s
where I got some of her traits from.. I can’t stand idiots;
especially “idiot leaders”. Whatever the problem, she’ll
dissect it and make my messed up mind clear again.. She’s
like this fast acting panadol.. If they have Mums in a tablet I
would stock my cupboard with it.. Have a problem? Pop a Mum pill.
Yeah! |
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This will sell faster than cocaine. |
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Ok
one last thing I gotta mention before this article gets out of
hand is the fact that my Mum is quick with discipline. My sisters
didn’t get much…. I think, but I got the clothes hangar,
the belt, the rotan (this one everybody kena). I must say the
belt hurts the most.. next comes rotan and hangar goes 3rd place.
Some of the instances I got a whopping is when I wrestled with
my younger sister and she banged her head on the wall. It was
an honest mistake, I did a perfectly executed suplex and she didn’t
move out of the way.
Her wailing triggered
Mum bionic ears and I got a major whopping. Then comes the time
I lost my temper with my cousin and I kicked him in the kidneys…
I was Primary 4 at that time.. and the kid was annoying the
crap out of me. He didn’t cry but he told his Mum about
it which in turn told my Mum and I got some lashes on my legs..
Yup, whatever body part you use to commit the crime, that body
part will bear some lashing marks :D
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conclude this article about my Emak, I just wanna say that you should
be thankful of your Mum and even if you didn’t buy your Mum
anything on Mothers’ Day, you should let her know that you
appreciate her. Say: "Forgive my parents, O Lord, because they
have taken care of me when I was young." Amin!
Mama’s Boy,
Evil Bunny!
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| "Dear
Mama"
You are appreciated
When I was young me
and my mama had beef
Seventeen years old kicked out on the streets
Though back at the time, I never thought I'd see her face
Ain't a woman alive that could take my mama's place
Suspended from school; and scared to go home, I was a fool
with the big boys, breakin all the rules
I shed tears with my baby sister
Over the years we was poorer than the other little kids
And even though we had different daddy's, the same drama
When things went wrong we'd blame mama
I reminice on the stress I caused, it was hell
Huggin on my mama from a jail cell
And who'd think in elementary?
Heeey! I see the penitentiary, one day
And runnin from the police, that's right
Mama catch me, put a whoopin to my backside
And even as a crack fiend, mama
You always was a black queen, mama
I finally understand
for a woman it ain't easy tryin to raise a man
You always was committed
A poor single mother on welfare, tell me how ya did it
There's no way I can pay you back
But the plan is to show you that I understand
You are appreciated
Lady...
Don't cha know we love ya? Sweet lady
Dear mama
Place no one above ya, sweet lady
You are appreciated
Don't cha know we love ya?
Now ain't nobody tell
us it was fair
No love from my daddy cause the coward wasn't there
He passed away and I didn't cry, cause my anger
wouldn't let me feel for a stranger
They say I'm wrong and I'm heartless, but all along
I was lookin for a father he was gone
I hung around with the Thugs, and even though they sold drugs
They showed a young brother love
I moved out and started really hangin
I needed money of my own so I started slangin
I ain't guilty cause, even though I sell rocks
It feels good puttin money in your mailbox
I love payin rent when the rent's due
I hope ya got the diamond necklace that I sent to you
Cause when I was low you was there for me
And never left me alone because you cared for me
And I could see you comin home after work late
You're in the kitchen tryin to fix us a hot plate
Ya just workin with the scraps you was given
And mama made miracles every Thanksgivin
But now the road got rough, you're alone
You're tryin to raise two bad kids on your own
And there's no way I can pay you back
But my plan is to show you that I understand
You are appreciated
Pour out some liquor
and I reminsce, cause through the drama
I can always depend on my mama
And when it seems that I'm hopeless
You say the words that can get me back in focus
When I was sick as a little kid
To keep me happy there's no limit to the things you did
And all my childhood memories
Are full of all the sweet things you did for me
And even though I act craaazy
I gotta thank the Lord that you made me
There are no words that can express how I feel
You never kept a secret, always stayed real
And I appreciate, how you raised me
And all the extra love that you gave me
I wish I could take the pain away
If you can make it through the night there's a brighter day
Everything will be alright if ya hold on
It's a struggle everyday, gotta roll on
And there's no way I can pay you back
But my plan is to show you that I understand
You are appreciated
Sweet lady
And dear mama
Dear mama
Lady [3X]
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